When I was asked by NextGen’s Jacqui Fraser to contribute an guest post on the theme of “community”, I asked, “which one?” NextGen’s guest bloggers are selected on the basis of what each of them might bring to the topic at hand, whatever that might be. I started to wonder why I might have been selected. It’s strange, because I’m usually defined (by myself or others) by the ways I don’t fit in, rather than the ways that I am a part of the group. So here goes:
 

I am first and foremost a member of my family. Three, actually: mine, my partner’s, and my sister’s in-laws. My parents are quite active in the Japanese-Canadian community, so occasionally that comes into play. I am also a friend, moving within several different circles. Some of my friend groups intersect, some have no idea the others exist. I am a writer, so I have colleagues who are also writers, as well as clients from many different industries. I’m implicated in the arts community as a board member in two organizations as well as a nearly-emergent creative writer. I used to play in a couple of bands, so there’s that too. I hover in the margins of the foodie scene. I’m a member of my community league as well as a contributor to a number of projects in the Alberta Avenue area generally. I’m on a few online social networks. I volunteer. I have a great dog, and yes, there is a dog community as well.
 

So. Which one? Where do I fit?

These communities seem so random. So I think we need to change the way we think about fitting in. This has great implications, not just in our personal lives, but on the discourse of “diversity” and “multiculturalism”. The usual way people think about diversity is that an outside group is allowed to join an insider group. It almost never occurs to anyone that those on the “outside” were already a part of the inside, but were discouraged or prevented to join it.

Fitting in implies that like individuals belong together, and that those who are unlike are square pegs. You don’t fit.

And how! It’s a running thread throughout my life. I’m an oddball. A weirdo. I’m not a team player. But look! All those groups. The only thing that those different communities has in common is me. Who do I represent today?

The answer is: it depends. It depends on context, and what’s relevant in any given interaction. But no matter which community comes into play in one specific situation, there they all are. Though each community may seem to have boundaries, they are permeable because each of us carries within us numerous interests. Community is an infinite Venn diagram, with each of us connecting to everyone else. Or, to use another scientific metaphor, we are multivalent: it is through each individual (atoms) that a community is formed (bonds), and each community is connected to others through its members.

There is no outside to community, any community. A community cannot exist in isolation.

It would be impossible (or very difficult) for a community to be perfectly insular. In fact, there have been many moments in my career when knowing the right oddball has really helped. Fitting in hasn’t mattered as much as finding belonging.

So ask yourself: where do you belong? Who do you know? Where do you contribute? Where do you exist?

Bio:
Mari Sasano

Mari is a journalist, writer and editor from Edmonton, Alberta. She earned a BA (Honours) in English and an MA in English from the University of Alberta. Mari began her writing career in 1998 as a film reviewer for SEE Magazine. She wrote the popular 8 1/2 Things To Do column in the Edmonton Journal’s ed section in the early to mid ‘00s, which led to other freelance functions at the Journal, including general arts and entertainment, lifestyle, and food writer. In 2010, she was awarded the Canadian Mental Health Association’s Media Award in recognition for her coverage of mental health issues in the Edmonton Journal.

She has contributed articles and short fiction in magazines such as Broken Pencil, RicePaper, Alberta Views, Avenue Edmonton, and Legacy. She was also the editor of the Rat Creek Press from 2009-2010. In 2010, Mari was commissioned a children’s play for the Sprouts festival. A VERY Grouchy Dragon was an audience favourite, and is now in development to be expanded into a full-length musical.

Mari has also worked as a videographer, sandwich-maker, bass player, secretary, record store cashier, and hair model. Currently she is a communications professional in the arts, sporadic contributor to the Journal, and is a food dispenser for her Boston terrier, Henry. You can follow Mari @marisasano on Twitter.
 

Disclaimer
NextGen Speaks Out, our guest blogging series, is envisioned as a hub for information and discussion. NextGen is a non-political, non-denominational organization focused on giving all nextgeners a voice. NextGen does not represent the opinions expressed by the individual columnists.