I was asked to write this post as I am perceived to be an expert at motherhood. Flattering, but it made me laugh out loud.

I can picture it in my mind. Three little kids standing at the playground having a discussion.

Kid 1: “My mom left me in the swing a lot when I was a baby. Apparently, she chose showering and eating over me.”
Kid 2: “Yeah? As a baby, my mom forgot to clean the rolls in my neck until I started to smell”
Kid 3: “I have you all beat. My mom let me eat dog food.”

Kid 3 has blonde hair and green eyes. How do I know this? She’s mine.

After having my first baby, I went a little mental. Everything had to be perfect. I had to be perfect- The perfect mom.

I met up with other moms and talked about our baby’s milestones. I was jealous when my daughter met a milestone late and a little too proud when she met one early.

I used to change her diapers on the changing table every time. I bought the most expensive diapers, bottles and toys. She wore little outfits all day and night.

When she started crawling, life got complicated. I couldn’t just walk away from her and expect her to be in the same place anymore. I had to watch her every move.

The first time she crawled over to the dog food, I jumped up in full panic and ripped the food right out of her chubby, little fist.

The next time she crawled to the bowl, I could see her hand moving in slow motion towards the food. She was staring right at me, taunting me.

Once again, I jumped up, smacked the food out of her hand. This happened another six or seven times. It became a game for her. The “if I do this, Mommy yells and comes running” game.

As she went near the food bowl again, I watched. I did not jump up. I looked her right in the eyes as her arm extended and she grabbed a pellet.

She moved the pellet closer and closer to her mouth. I just watched.

She put the dog food in her mouth and only chewed once. The look on her face was a cross between total terror and complete disgust. She immediately spit it out and started crying.

She never went after the food again.

Even after eating dog food, my older daughter has met all of her milestones. She’s a smart, compassionate and hilarious. She is one happy girl.

My youngest daughter came into the world 10 weeks ago. She’s wearing Costco diapers that I change on the ottoman, bed, couch or even my lap. Her bottles were the ones on sale and her toys are hand-me-downs. She spends a lot of her time without clothing. Less clothing = less laundry.

Does this mean that I love her any less? No, of course not. It means that I’ve learned a couple of things during my first go around as a mom and about motherhood in general.

Motherhood is trial and error. Motherhood is feeling overwhelmed at times and complete bliss in others. Most importantly, I learned that there is no such thing as a perfect mom.

The three kids in the playground talking about how terrible their moms are never actually happened. How do I know this?

Our kids don’t remember our mistakes and lessons learned. They remember the love, comfort and warmth. They remember the time that we spend together.

Am I an expert at motherhood? No. But, I do know what to do when my youngest daughter goes after the dog food.

Bio:
Jennifer Banks

Jennifer is a mom to two daughters (3 and <1) and a self-proclaimed nerd (although she does prefer the term- Geek Chic). When she's not working for an online marketing firm you can find her blogging about technology and parenting on www.techmommy.ca or on Twitter or LinkedIn

Disclaimer
NextGen Speaks Out, our guest blogging series, is envisioned as a hub for information and discussion. NextGen is a non-political, non-denominational organization focused on giving all nextgeners a voice. NextGen does not represent the opinions expressed by the individual columnists.